Many years before I got together with my boyfriend, I had a sex thing with this guy that I thought was relationship-material. He not only had an amazing body but a great personality as well. I was honest when I met him that I was looking for something more than just sex, and he led me to believe that was what he wanted, too. Between having mind-blowing sex, we ordered in, played video games, and watched movies, couple-y type things but without the label. But when I tried to get him to go to a show or out to dinner with me, he refused. My frustration grew as the months went on, and one day I confronted him. When I realized that he was ashamed of being seen with me, I felt as if I had been punched in the stomach — a place where much of my pain already resided. He did me a favor by not continuing to lead me on. Otherwise, I might still be trying to prove to him that I was worth any shit he might have gotten from other people. If I was still his secret shame, I might not have met my boyfriend, so thanks, athletic-asshole.
Touch—and I cannot stress this enough—the FUPA.
Sex toys are for everyone
It's a subject which is still taboo and sometimes a source of ridicule - fat people having sex. Emma Tamsin Hill is one of those people and she has made a film which looks at the concerns of Britain's increasingly super-size population. Now 22, she says the three years while she studied were a steep learning curve of how men behaved towards her. She said: "Looking back I think men preyed on me because of my size. It was all consensual and I wasn't promiscuous but I had a few experiences with boys who left me feeling used. Now Emma who has a large social media following say her eyes have been opened and she is much more confident. She said: "Fat people like me have no problem actually doing the deed of sex but often have problems getting naked in front of people.
The F Word is a series celebrating what it means to be fat — from destigmatizing the word to taking stock of the discrimination fat people face. Whatever size you are — fat, skinny, or anywhere in between — you should feel comfortable and good about what you are doing, and that includes sex. Just you. To get more clear on what consent means and entails check out this cool graphic brought to you by Planned Parenthood. And, of course, there are many ways to make sex safer, which you can learn more about here. Lube is an absolute necessity for anal sex , and with penetrative sex, lube can actually make sex easier and more enjoyable as well as help prevent possible micro-tears in the vagina and anus caused by a lot of friction. The handle has a long reach, making it a win for vulvas.
I was 16, a size 14 and it was —long before body positivity hit the mainstream or my Tumblr feed. Now, as a year-old woman wearing a size 20, sex has changed year after year as my body has gotten bigger and the dating pool has gotten smaller. Before fucking someone new, I feel the need to address my fatness before we meet.